I came to yoga in August 2005 simply because of some physical discomfort. I wanted nothing but a professional and quite place to practice. Now it has been a year and nine months since I came to SPACE. I have gained so much out of this trend that has swept Taiwan, which is not what I have expected.
Like everyone I used to feel tired after an Asana session. It was just like after any other excercise, on the next day always I felt like I was beatened, there was nothing but pain! At first I thought it was because my muscles were just tight, so I did even more Asanas. I did them deeper and harder, and I challenged all the difficult poses. At first I did lots of arm balances, inversions as well as all the circus-like poses. However, when I was proud of what I could do, my injuries quickly stopped me from doing them. My left wrist bone sticked out, and it hurt even in downdog. For about half a year I was in between the "practice" and the "pain".
When the injury first occured I was really upset. I wan't willing to let go of anything advanced poses that I had attained. The pain, however, had become my teacher. Whenever it hurt I couldn't keep on getting deeper, which allowed me to turn my attension to accutually "feel" my pain, instead of ignoring or putting it off. Gradually, I stopped caring how much I can bend or how wide my legs can split. I finally began to pay attention to the sensations of my body - be it soreness, tightness, pain, comfort, opening, etc... Once I started looking into these feelings more than my poses, I found that I'm no longer in pain after a practice, and I felt the energy wihin during Savasana.
So the lesson was that I wasn't doing anything that the teachers were trying to convey to all of us: when in practice, put the mind on the body - or, finding stillness in movement! This was difficult to understand at first, but I understood that when I only cared about the outer form of the poses, the "substance" was lost. I was only abusing and forcing my flexibility into the form, which was totally not the point of the practice.
I'm really happy that I finally see this on my journey. Now that with proper alignment my bone was back into place, and my life is also aligned - with the pusaltion of the Divine. I'm really thankful for my teahers, Felina, Naichin, and Bruce, who is now back in the States. I wasted so much time as a result of not listening to what they were teaching, but it was this downfall that enabled me to cultivate energy, to expand compassion and love. Not only my outer body is healed now, my inner body is nurtutred than ever.